A Visit to a Pet Cemetery

Yesterday I had an errand that required a visit to a local pet cemetery.  Never having been to a pet cemetery before, I took the opportunity to walk around and see for myself what one is like.

Visually the landscape was similar to a human cemetery except on a smaller scale.  The grounds were very well maintained with flowers placed on or nearby some of the graves.  The majority of the graves were marked by flat (flush with the ground) stones.  Small sculptures, mostly recreating the likeness of an animal or specifically, someone’s deceased pet, also graced the grounds.

By far, the most compelling part of my visit was reading the inscriptions on the gravestones.  Some were very simple, including just the name of the pet and his/her years of birth and death.  Others were more elaborate with the words carefully chosen to reflect the depth of the pet owner’s relationship with their loved one and the profound loss they experienced following their pet’s death.  Still others were more whimsical or humorous, capturing some favorite pet pastime or memorable personality trait.  Rather than feeling sad as I read the epitaphs, I actually felt lighthearted.  Clearly this was due to the meticulous thought pet owners had given to the words they had engraved on their pets’ tombstones.  And so as I read each epitaph, my mind tried to visualize the animal associated with it and I found myself smiling, occasionally even laughing out loud.

It wasn’t until I walked back to my car that sadness began to settle in around me.  I felt like I was leaving so many loved ones behind and I could not take them with me.  My mind leaped forward to those days somewhere in the future, when my own dogs will no longer be with me.  And that caused me to consider what I will do with my pets’ remains.  Would I bury them in a pet cemetery like this one?

While this cemetery was a beautiful place and only goodness inhabited it, I concluded that it was not a place that I would want to bury my pets.  Rather, I would continue down the path that I started more than thirteen years ago when our last pet passed away.  Our pets’ ashes will be with us in our home.  And when I leave this world, I will have their ashes buried with me.  I will clearly need to do my homework on how to make this happen.  But for right now, it gives me a great deal of comfort.

I had no idea that a visit to a pet cemetery on a sunny San Diego morning would lead me to do this kind of soul searching.  What an amazing day!

In Memory of Jim Buck

Every occupation has its own unique history including where and how it originated, and how it evolved over time until the current day.  This even applies to the profession of dog walking.

Earlier this month, the New York Times reported the death of Jim Buck.  Mr. Buck was a native New Yorker who is credited with having started the first dog walking business in the city (and in the U.S. for that matter).  He operated “Jim Buck’s School for Dogs” for approximately 40 years.  Jim ran his business with the help of more than twenty assistants.  Together they provided daily walks for over 150 New York dogs.  He and his dog walkers rambled up and down city streets and through Central Park providing each owner’s pet with at least 12 miles of exercise.  The dog walkers themselves walked approximately 25 miles each day and fanned out across Manhattan in pairs, each person commanding the leashes of six or more dogs at one time.   

I did some of my own research about Jim Buck and located a “Talk of the Town” segment about him in The New Yorker magazine from 1965 and a newspaper article from 1996.  What a fascinating man!  In the course of reading about his life and his business, I immediately felt a strong kindred spirit.  Why?  Because there are several common threads to our lives – traced back to place, physical traits and personal style:

(1) Both Jim and I spent time as children in Connecticut; he trained horses there and I was born and grew up there.

(2) The New York Times referenced his lifelong slim physique and weight of 145 pounds.  A photograph reveals his long legs suitable for making strides and going for extended walks.  I also have a trim physique and consistently maintain a body weight of 145 pounds.  When I lived on the East Coast and frequently spent time in New York, going for long walks in the city was one of my favorite pastimes.

(3) Jim was typically seen sporting fine clothing, often wearing grey flannel and tweed as he walked Manhattan with his canine entourage.  Those who know me well can attest to my own personal fashion sense.  When I lived in Boston (and travelled to New York for business and to attend theater), I enjoyed dressing smartly often wearing tailored wool suits, crisp dress shirts and fine leather shoes.  At the time, the only thing I lacked was a well-groomed dog by my side.

But of course, I feel most connected to Jim across the decades given the occupation we share.

Today I walk dogs in and around La Jolla, a far cry from the towering cityscape of Manhattan.  But since reading about Jim Buck’s life, when I now set out to walk a dog, I think of Jim and his groundbreaking efforts to professionalize dog walking.  When people ask me what I do, I proudly explain that I am a pet care professional and have my own business.   As I speak these words, I think of Jim Buck fondly.  And so, I say “Thank You Jim” for turning your love for dogs into an occupation and setting the course for dog walking history more than 50 years ago.

Cheers!

My Multiple Dog Personality: Part 2

In my last post, I disclosed my multiple dog personality – my adoration for larger breed dogs along side my actual pet ownership of small breed dogs (Shih Tzus to be precise).

Upon close examination of my feelings, I’ve been able to identify the reasons for my small dog affinity.  First, there is a very practical reason.  Throughout almost all of my adulthood, I’ve lived in condominiums or apartments.  While these living spaces have not been tiny, they also have not been expansive.  It wouldn’t seem fair to a large dog to be confined to a limited space, especially one with no private yard or secure outdoor area in which to run and play.  Our Shih Tzus weigh approximately thirteen pounds each and are fairly sedentary; this is a perfect pet size and lifestyle to negotiate around a 2-bedroom, 2-bath condo. 

The second reason relates to ergonomics.  When I’m not performing dog walking or pet care services for my clients like kitty home visits or pet sitting, I tend to spend time working on my laptop.  One of my dogs, Lucy, loves to be held.  It’s much more comfortable to sit in my office doing computer-based work with her in my lap than it would be with an affectionate and well-intentioned Weimaraner pinning me down in a half nelson.

Third, I’m very tactile and affectionate with dogs.  That said, it is so easy and personally soothing to be able to wrap my arms completely around a small dog like a Shih Tzu than it would be to pick one body part like a Great Dane’s head and scratch both of its ears only having to leave its feet for a later reflexology treatment. 

Finally, there is the small female dog factor.  This one is a bit more elusive. Nonetheless, I experience immense joy when my two girls come home from a day of beauty at their grooming salon with decorative bows adorning their backs.  I’ve resisted dressing my dogs in canine haute couture and crowning them with diva-esque tiaras, but the feminine bows certainly add something and I look forward to picking them up and seeing which colors Jeanine has selected for them this time. 

And so while I yearn to own a larger breed “guy’s dog” someday, for right now I’m perfectly happy with my two Shih Tzu daughter dogs as they create their own feminine mystique in an otherwise all male household.  You Go Girls!  Your Dad promises to manage his multiple dog personality and keep his big dog feelings in check.  “Doctor, how much is that therapy going to cost me?”

My Multiple Dog Personality: Part 1

I feel so fortunate to be able to spend time with animals and integrate them with my work.  Furthermore, my dog walking and pet sitting experiences have led me to think more about my close relationships with dogs.

For more than 13 years, my partner Michael and I have been parents to two female Shih Tzus.  And before this, we shared our lives with another female Shih Tzu.  One would conclude based upon our history of pet ownership that we are partial to small dog breeds, females and specifically, Shih Tzus.  But this conclusion is only partially true.

For many years (and continuing to the present day), I have harbored a strong desire to parent a larger breed dog.  These feelings intensify when I see a pet owner with their Great Dane, Weimaraner or Vizsla (to name only a few of my favorite breeds).

Recently, I have sought to understand the underlying reasons for my feelings.  One relates to the regal appearance and magnificent form of larger breed dogs.  They are handsome, stand tall and seem to convey self-assuredness.  Of course, sometimes the opposite is true.  For example, many of the Great Danes I’ve met are much closer to big sweet kids that prefer to trot along the side of their parents.  They also lumber along, a little uncomfortable in their own large bodies.  And if they have smaller dogs for siblings, their brother or sister often assumes the alpha dog position.  With regard to Weimaraners and Vizslas, I find their physical beauty is enhanced by their startling eyes and the intense gaze they’re able to maintain.  They seem to convey the message. “You can’t fool me.  I know what’s going on.  I see and hear everything that’s happening.”

Another reason for my large breed appeal is they figure prominently into my wish to have a male dog “buddy”.  This is a “guy’s dog” who would sit next to me on the sofa and watch television as I eat munchies (of course, I’d also give him some healthy treats to be perfectly fair), ride next to me in my pickup truck* (if I were to own one) as we travel on adventures together or simply go to the dog park and play catch with me.  In other words, I think it would be awesome to have a four-legged guy around with whom I can do stuff.

Check back in a few days to learn more about my multiple dog personality; my inner psychic life as Dad to a big dog rubbing up against the reality of my holding toy dogs in my lap as I shower them with hugs and kisses.  “It’s okay Doctor!  I don’t believe my condition is serious.”

*Please note that it is not safe to travel with your dog sitting next to you in a moving vehicle.  Should you become involved in an accident, great physical harm and possibly death could occur.  Always secure your four-legged loved ones in the rear seat using a dog restraint device (e.g., special pet seat belt, harness, etc.).